Archive for the ‘Jokes’ Category

What a coincidence!

Posted: September 14, 2011 in Jokes

Read this one recently…

A chicken farmer went to a local bar, sat next to a woman, and ordered a glass of champagne. The woman perks up and says, “How about that? I just ordered a glass of champagne, too!”

“What a coincidence,” he said, “This is a special day for me, I’m celebrating.”

“This is a special day for me, too, and I’m also celebrating!,” says the woman.

“What a coincidence,” says the man. As they clinked glasses he asked, “What are you Celebrating?”

Cheers!

“My husband and I have been trying to have a child, and today my gynaecologist told me I’m pregnant!”

“What a coincidence,” says the man. “I’m a chicken farmer. For years all my hens were infertile, but today they’re finally laying fertilized eggs.”

“That’s great!” says the woman, “How did your chickens become fertile?”

“I switched cocks,” he replied.

She smiled and said, “What a coincidence!”

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Are you Relax Singh? :)

Posted: May 25, 2011 in Jokes, Questions

Santa Singh is lying on a beach getting himself tanned. One man comes to him and asks “Are you relaxing?”. Santa replies – “I am Santa Singh”. After some time another man approaches him and asks “Excuse me, are you relaxing?”. Now Santa gets curious and retorts “No! I am Santa Singh!”. This happens quite a few times and Santa gets completely frustrated; gets up and walks away.

As he is going back, out of his curiosity he asks another man lying under a tree near the beach – “Oye! Are you Relax Singh?”. The person says “Yes”. Santa gives him a tight slap and says – “So many people are looking for you out there and you are lying here??!!”

😀 😀 😀

Personal Questions

Posted: June 20, 2010 in Jokes

Could not resist posting this here. 🙂

A mother is driving her little girl to her friend’s house for a play date.
‘Mommy,’ the little girl asks, ‘how old are you?’
‘Honey, you are not supposed to ask a lady her age,’ the mother replied. ‘It’s not polite.’
‘OK’, the little girl says,
‘How much do you weigh?’
‘Now really,’ the mother says,
‘those are personal questions and are really none of your business.’
Undaunted, the little girl asks, ‘Why did you and Daddy get a divorce?’
‘That’s enough questions, young lady! Honestly!’
The exasperated mother walks away as the two friends begin to play.
‘My Mom won’t tell me anything about her,’ the little girl says to her friend.
‘Well,’ says the friend, ‘all you need to do is look at her driver’s license. It’s like a report card, it has everything on it.’
Later that night the little girl says to her mother, ‘I know how old you are. You are 32.’
The mother is surprised and asks ‘How did you find that out?
‘I also know that you weigh 130 pounds.’
The mother is past surprised and shocked now.
‘How in Heaven’s name did you find that out?’
‘And,’ the little girl says triumphantly, ‘I know why you and daddy got a divorce..’
‘Oh really?’ the mother asks. ‘Why?’
‘Because you got an ‘F’ in sex.’ 🙂 🙂

Love,

Suman.